Strange Bed Fellows!

While employed with Jasper Park Lodge as a Public Area Supervisor, my team and I were responsible for completing guest calls during the hours between 11:00 pm and 7:00 am. When you have a 440 plus room hotel, sometimes it can get quite busy.

One night I had quite an embarrassing call. Actually I have had many but this is just one of those unfortunate incidents that seem to always occur to me.

At approximately 1:30 am, I received a call from a guest who heard a strange noise coming from his bathroom. I asked the receptionist who answered the telephone if he specified what type of noise. With a slight laughter in her voice she said it was a gurgling noise. I thought to myself, I have had a few noises come from my bathroom when I was in there but I wouldn’t call them gurgling!

I proceeded to the guest cabin and knocked on the door. A Japanese gentleman who looked to be in his late 20’s early 30’s opened the door. I told him I was there to investigate the noise coming from his bathroom. He just stared at me and said nothing, so I asked if I may come in. Without saying a word, he motioned for me to enter the room. The room was completely dark, so thinking he was going to turn on some light for me I proceeded to walk straight.

Now having 446 rooms in the hotel with many different room configurations, it was impossible for me to know every one, even if I have been in many of them. This caused a huge problem for me that night as the room was smaller than I had thought. So just after a few steps forward something hit me in the kneecaps. It was the bed.

Down I went, on top of the gentlemen’s poor wife! I knew there was a body under me as I could feel it, but it did not move. Oh my God, had I killed her?! The gentleman who let me in was still standing at the open door. He must have heard me fall, as I am not a small guy so anything I do involves some noise, especially falling!

Trying to get up off the lady was a predicament, as in the dark I did not want to touch anything I shouldn’t be touching. Although I am sure I touched everything as I put my hands up to try and feel my way around before I discovered I had a female pinned under me.

Since the gentleman at the door still had not turned on a light so I could see, I realized the best way was to roll onto the floor between the bed and the wall. I made a loud “thump” as I hit the floor and wall. Lying on the floor, I fumbled to get the tiny flashlight I always carried. The gentleman, still at the door, said nothing. The lady in the bed still did not make a sound.

I hurried to my feet and using my flashlight found my way to the bathroom. I was too embarrassed to look in the direction of the bed. I discovered the noise was coming from a pipe on the outside of the building. I told the gentleman this from the bathroom, not worrying about waking up his wife as I figured after what just happened, she had to be awake, even if she did not make any sound.

On my way out of the bathroom I informed the guest that there was nothing that could be done at the moment but I would get maintenance to look after it first thing in the morning. He still did not respond. Then just as I was at the door approximately where I fell, the light of my flashlight shone brightly on the features of my victim.

There lying in the bed with beautiful long blond hair, blue eyes, and an opened mouth with bright red lipstick was a life size rubber sex doll!

The Chicken Dance

Before moving to Alberta in 1998 I was employed for six years as a clown. I attended many children’s parties, both as a clown and as many other characters. My specialty was “Singing Telegrams” which were mainly done for adults. I would usually surprise them at work, compliments of their co-workers.

One of the most common characters at the time for children (and even sometimes adults) was Barney the purple dinosaur. It seemed as though whenever I would do this character, some little boy would kick or punch me in the groin. Little boys were always the worst. They were more interested in attacking me as opposed to the girls who always wanted to hug the character. Although if you think about it, if you met Barney in person, wouldn’t you want to punch him in the groin too, I know I would!

Throughout the six years I had a few costume malfunctions. Usually caused by some little boy who wanted to see how much force it would take to rip off the Pink Panther’s tail or how hard he would have to punch me before I would knock him “accidentally” up the side of my head. “Sorry madam I couldn’t see the little fellow. It’s very hard to see out of this mask!”

Of course going to strange places dressed in a costume when I did not have peripheral vision was sometimes dangerous. High schools were usually the most dangerous. After the following incident we gave up schools all together.

I had a singing telegram to do in a high school at lunch time. A teacher was supposed to meet me outside at my van and escort me in to the cafeteria and back out again. When he did not show I proceeded on my own. Before reaching the door some idiot tried to catch my costume, a large white gorilla, on fire with a lighter. Luckily for me the material was flame retardant and did not catch but did leave a burn mark. Someone also threw a lit cigarette at me which got caught in the fur and stayed there until I took off the suit. I made it into the school and a teacher met me inside and brought me to the cafeteria and then abandoned me. I completed my performance and left the cafeteria. Walking through the hallway some guy pushed me into a locker hard enough to cause me to fall down. Soon as I hit the floor, he gave me a kick to the ribs. The guy thought this was very funny. Luckily the padding from the suit and my arm took most of the blow, but I was furious. As I knew what he looked like but he did not know me from my costume, I went back with the principal and then had him charged with assault. He was also kicked out of school as he was the school bully and was on his last leg.

That was probably the worst incident which happened to me during my “party” employment. I did have a very embarrassing incident which happened the week before coming to Alberta on my last day of work. I still believe I was set up for this one.

I had to go to Memorial University’s Breezeway Club and sing “Happy Birthday” to a girl in the middle of the dance floor dressed as a big yellow chicken. I arrived at the club, which at that time was one of the biggest dance clubs in Newfoundland. Someone met me at my van and escorted me in, as was planned. The bar was packed with wall to wall people and we had trouble getting through the crowd. My escort had me by the hand and we eventually made it to the middle of the dance floor. I was brought to the Birthday girl and the dance music stopped and everyone became amazingly quiet.

I started singing “Happy Birthday to you” and just as I had finished the last line, my worse fears in this business happened; the girl grabbed the head of my costume and made a run for it. After a few seconds of realizing what happened I took off in pursuit of my head! As I started fighting my way through the crowd with everyone laughing at me, I heard the DJ speak. “He’s a little request for our yellow friend on the dance floor, The Chicken Dance”

So here I was, running through a wall of people dressed in all yellow from my neck down trying to catch the girl who took my head as “The Chicken Dance” song played in the background. I was unable to catch the girl, so dejected and embarrassed I walked back to my van all along getting laughs from people outside the club.

Just as I had taken off the rest of my chicken suit the girl came by the van to return my head and to apologize. Even if the apology was though laughter, I forgave her. She gave me a hug and I thought to myself, I’m glad I am moving to Alberta!

The Ghost of JPL

I have never been a strong believer in ghosts. After my experience one early morning at Jasper Park Lodge I had to rethink a little more about my beliefs.

It was 5:00 am on March 10, 2000. For anyone who is familiar with JPL, there is a restaurant just off the Great Hall called the Moose’s Nook. In this restaurant was a large server station which I used to get clean water for various cleaning projects. I was employed as a Public Area Houseperson at this time.

On this particular morning I was at the server station which was located in an area where I could see the entire dining room including all exits. I filled up my bucket with water and proceeded to leave the server station and something caught my eye. Near the back and to the left, sitting at a table was an elderly lady. She had short grayish coloured hair and was wearing a dark blouse and what looked like an old style apron, with the straps made of a white frilly material. I could only see her from the chest up as she was sitting with her arms on the table in a folded position. Her head was leaning forward as if she was praying.

Now in a hotel the size of JPL we would always get guests early in the morning looking for breakfast. As all the lights were on in the restaurant, I assumed she thought the restaurant was open for breakfast and looked as though she was waiting for someone to join her.

Turning toward the lady I said in a louder than normal voice, “Good Morning, May I help you?” Her head started to rise just as I took my eyes off her and focused on the chairs I was walking around so I would not fall down. Resuming my glance a split second later in her direction, I felt a cold rush of air run through me. The lady was gone. I immediately had goose bumps run up my spine. (I still get them even now as I write this.) It was physically impossible for any human to leave through one of the 3 exit doors in the split second I had taken my eyes off her. I stood there for a few minutes just staring, as I was in disbelief of what just occurred.

I left the Moose’s Nook and started walking toward the Front Desk. A Security Officer and the Night Auditor were standing outside the desk chatting and when they saw me, as they told me later, I was a pasty white. They asked me immediately what was wrong as they could see something happened. I told them of my experience and the Security Officer went with me back to the restaurant and I showed him where the lady was sitting. I immediately got goose bumps again as I approached the table where the elderly lady was sitting. Arriving at the table, we saw that a chair was moved out and tipped over backward as if someone got up in a hurry.

Needless to say word spread very quickly about this incident. I did some research and apparently there have been ghost sightings throughout the years at JPL. One in particular involves an elderly husband and wife. The wife was always seen in the dining room, the husband was always wandering on the outside. The story was that this lady would be always sitting in the dining room waiting for her husband to come and eat.

Upon further research I was shown a photograph from the dining room taken in the 1920’s. The photograph was suppose to be of a ghost and showed an empty dining room with a shadowy figure sitting at one of the tables. As I stared at the photo, my jaw dropped. It looked to be the same lady I had seen!

To my knowledge, at least up until I left Jasper in May 2002, the actual photograph was hung in the Great Hall near the Moose’s Nook. I was told the story of my encounter was also mentioned at employee orientation. I had become a small part of the legend of the ghosts. To this day, I still can’t believe what my eyes saw that early morning at Jasper Park Lodge.

Another Sicko!!

While at the Gym I was watching the news on one of the many television screens they have and seen a story about a 19 year old who put a 2 month old baby in a Microwave and turned it on. Check out the story here. The baby survived but is in critical condition.

I can’t believe someone is that sick to do such a thing. He faces up to 99 years in prison but if they had real justice, they would string him up in the town square like they did 1000 years ago and let all the parents of children stone him to death. Well at least in the United States, usually the punishment fits the crime; unlike here in Canada; where the criminals have more rights than the victims. The Young Offenders Act is just a joke, and will always be that was because the judges are afraid to give out any sort of punishment to fit the crime. They are certainly not afraid to take their huge paycheques every week. Look at the story of 15 year old Matthew Churchill, killed by a hit and run driver, who admitted to it and then was sentenced and only served 4 months! Yet his parents Rod & Desma are sentenced to a lifetime of grieving for their only child.

What Goes Around.....

His name was Fleming, and he was a poor Scottish farmer. One day, while trying to make a living for his family, he heard a cry for help coming from a nearby bog.

He dropped his tools and ran to the bog. There, mired to his waist in black muck, was a terrified boy, screaming and struggling to free himself. Farmer Fleming saved the lad from what could have been a slow and terrifying death.

The next day, a fancy carriage pulled up to the Scotsman's sparse surroundings. An elegantly dressed nobleman stepped out and introduced himself as the father of the boy Farmer Fleming had saved. "I want to repay you," said the nobleman. "You saved my son's life."

"No, I can't accept payment for what I did," the Scottish farmer replied, waving off the offer.

At that moment, the farmer's own son came to the door of the family hovel. "Is that your son?" the nobleman asked. "Yes," the farmer replied proudly.

"I'll make you a deal. Let me take him and give him a good education. If the lad is anything like his father, he'll grow to a man you can be proud of."

And that he did.

In time, Farmer Fleming's son graduated from St .Mary's Hospital Medical School in London, and went on to become known throughout the world as the noted Sir Alexander Fleming, the discoverer of Penicillin.

Years afterward, the nobleman's son was stricken with pneumonia. What saved him? Penicillin.

The name of the nobleman? Lord Randolph Churchill. His son's name? Sir Winston Churchill.

Someone once said: What goes around comes around. Work like you don't need the money. Love like you've never been hurt. Dance like nobody's watching.

The Masterpiece!

A couple of weeks ago I was away from home for about 4 days. My school I attend is in Bay Roberts which is about 1 hour from St. John's, so before my first day at the school I stayed with relatives in Brigus which is very close to Bay Roberts. Anyway when I got home my daughter ran to me as soon as I got in the door and handed me this picture all folded in her little hand with a big grin on her face. To everyone else it's just scribbles, to me it's a Masterpiece!